“All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.” Abraham Lincoln
Today is Mother’s Day. To me, it is simply a reminder that mine is no longer here…
My family and I will be going on the third anniversary of her passing in July. It has gotten easier as time goes by. The only exception is when there is a whole day dedicated to all the moms in the world. There are plenty of other wonderful mommies that are in my life. I am glad to know all of them and love all of them dearly, but I would give anything just to hang out with my Mama
If you know me well, I hardly go to church. I knew that Mother’s Day was coming up and planned to go and light a candle for my mom because I was unable to visit her grave today. My siblings and I were her most prized possessions, and she talked about us when she could. I woke up really early, dressed up nicely, and had a few moments to pay my respect towards the one person that brought me into this world. I did as much as I possibly could for her to make her proud.
I honestly wanted to do my best in trying to get through the day because it was going to be a bit difficult with everything everywhere about mothers. She would have asked me over a month ago what I would be getting her and to take extra time off so my visit would be longer, but I did cry a couple of times throughout the day simply because I love and miss her that much.
There are no words to explain that missing part of my life that I want back. I am very lucky to have a family as close as mine. Other people do find it a little odd when I mention how close we all are, but I think that is what makes us unique. I am truly grateful and very blessed that I grew up with such an amazing mom.
Last year, I spent Mother’s Day visiting home. I did not have that luxury this year, so I had no idea what to expect without being around my family. I did make sure to have some plans throughout the day. It was to be at the church early in the morning, grab a coffee at my current favorite café with a friend, chat with someone about freelancing, and then help out a bit at Farmer’s Market. Distractions were necessary, and people surprised me with the sweetest things that I did not expect at all.
I am not going to lie, but 2014 has been a rough year so far. The one good thing that I love is how fortunate I am to have met so many genuinely kind people this year. It is definitely something I am not used to, but it was nice to be told so many nice things. All the kindness, smiles, and care made me feel so much better by the time I got home.
The whole experience I had today has made me realize that it is okay to be sad, yet there is a lot to be happy about. Some people got to hear about my mom, and I got to hear about others’.
It does not matter whether yours has passed, the relationship is estranged, or you are not nearly as close to mom as I was to mine. I sincerely hope you have somebody in your life that has made a huge impact on you that makes you want to do awesome things for them. That is what matters more, and it comes from the heart.
I am pretty young and idealistic, but nothing beats feeling happy.